Log in

[[~**Pretty.On.The.Inside**~]] [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

i wish you could see how much this hurts me [May. 6th, 2005|07:56 pm]
[How I Feel |gigglygiggly]
[I'm Dancing To |kd lang.mums playing it.shes such a fem. lesbian whore]

Gemini: Keep your wits about your today. A small oversight could turn into something much bigger. Friendships should be supportive and even though not everyone will agree, tonight looks like it could be a rather good one for socialising.

sounds good.off to amy's tonight.she's back from the army for the weekend.will be so good to see her again.the glasshouse is a tame place but tis also fun cause we play pool lots.hope danny doesnt mind.he shouldnt.he knows i love him.and i know i am trusted.so is all good.she doesnt get home from airport till 9 or something.we not heading out till at least 10.she's going to be so drunk.im going to be the supportive sober friend.as my horoscope says.obey thy starsign. =] <3

p.s.parents are still cunts but i slept 4 hours last night.
p.p.s.hi Phobia.i hear you are less feral now.
Link5 comments|Leave a comment

(no subject) [May. 5th, 2005|07:16 pm]
[How I Feel |angryangry]
[I'm Dancing To |no music]


im off to basketball.then to get so drunk i cant see.thanks parents.once again you've fucked me up.i hate you both.really.i do.so much.hope you both go die.picking on me wont solve your goddam problems.and it wont make me lose weight.so why continue with this bullshit?its been ten years and you still cant get it through your thick heads.I DONT GIVE A SHIT IF IM OVERWEIGHT CAUSE IM HAPPY.MY WEIGHT MAKES YOU UNHAPPY?DEAL WITH IT CUNTS.*sigh*love yas all.i feel a slight overdose coming on.yay.

Link4 comments|Leave a comment

ive got a blister on the bottom of my heel and its stinging [May. 5th, 2005|11:17 am]
[How I Feel |artisticartistic]
[I'm Dancing To |the get up kids ~ red letter day]

just a quick one. could say im not in the mood to post a long entry but that would be an utter lie. i have nothing to do other than listen to get up kids and freeze myself to death while chatting to a couple of randoms and search for jobs i will never apply for. i also love going onto hot topic and putting every second pair of shoe laces and arm warmers on the wish list knowing full well that i wont become a member and i dont have a credit card.hehehe. "will you be my valentine from a world away. apologies breaking me. constants arent so constant anymore".

i didn't sleep last night. i think that makes it a total of 6 hours sleep this week. i dont feel tired but i know i look it.
accidentally went for a long walk home from the station. what was meant to take 15 mins took 40 something because i thought 'hey, ill be really shifty and smart and take a detour'.

hahahaha flicky you fucktard...

got basketball tonight for anyone thats not interested.
duaney you owe me 7 bucks for the subway LOL mmmmmm subway!
you better all be coming to myne and jessy's birthday.

p.s. new member of the mutilated toys to be exhibited soon. he just needs his guts ripped apart and some small knives in his arms..

Link7 comments|Leave a comment

fanks so much ashriot baybeh.... i needed to vent badly.. love yah! @--}--}----- [May. 4th, 2005|03:42 pm]
[How I Feel |gratefulgrateful]
[I'm Dancing To |Dropkick Murphys ~ Kiss Me I'm #!@*faced!]

fanks so much ashriot baybeh. I never feel like i can talk openly to anyone i know, but you helped so much and made me feel better bout myself and the situation. You're helping me to realise that i do deserve a lot better than i get and that i shouldnt be treated this way.
Your girlfriend is so so sooooooooooooooooooo fucking lucky to have you and everyone in Canada is soo0o0o0o lucky to live there cause they're closer to you physically than ill ever be!!! love yah! @--}--}----- You're the best chickie ever and i treasure what we have so much.
*beers and smokes and punk rawk... you n me.... forever*

thanks again baybeh.
Link1 comment|Leave a comment

(no subject) [May. 3rd, 2005|01:20 am]
[How I Feel |tiredover tired and sore and bored]

i think ive done this thing before.
fuck off, im bored and tired.

iCollapse )

Quote of the day: "dear god, please take this stain as a sacrifice"” - Flicky, after Rachie accidentally spelt Spray and Wipe as Pray and Wipe.
Link1 comment|Leave a comment

life is white and i am black jesus and his lawyers are coming back [May. 2nd, 2005|01:30 pm]
[How I Feel |thankfulthankful]
[I'm Dancing To |Oasis ~ Dont Look Back In Anger]

++.thanxks duaney. ill be over later. even if you're not home.++

two flicky characters!!!!Collapse )
Link8 comments|Leave a comment

acceptance is the starving girl that you created [May. 1st, 2005|08:01 pm]
[How I Feel |blahblah]
[I'm Dancing To |J.E.W ~ Blister]

~*Do this and then add it into your journal:
Pick three people and put their names in the comment of this entry. Then I have to choose one to marry, one to push off a cliff and one to have sex with. Needless to say i'll probably want to push them all off a cliff..*~

i fucking give up
fuck it
not worth it
it really isnt
fuck you

[[edit: i shared a shower this evening
he was so polite
ive never met anyone like him
it was almost as though he were scared
he sat there watching me
so tentative and reserved
i was naked
id only met him once
but here i was
completely vulnerable
when i turned off the taps i glanced up at him and said 'thanks'
i think i shall call him Gerald
i've never had a spider as a friend before ]]
Link13 comments|Leave a comment

yes well let me just say this... hbsu9qgw7fenawuogv8awr03ug~~~~~!!!! MWAHAHA TAKE THAT GEORGE BUSH!! [Apr. 29th, 2005|11:05 am]
[How I Feel |frustratedfrustrated]
[I'm Dancing To |motley crue]

so i'm light headed and bored
was meant to hang out with nick today but i don't think that'll happen
got dog tags so now im an army bitch
new photos with my boy to post when i get a chance to scan them


You pick three people- I have to choose one to marry, one to push off a cliff and one to have sex with. <== better do that somewhere in your reply to this post or i shall castrate you with a rusty fork...

West Coast kicked Brisbane by 70 points IN BRISBANE. oh we are SO much better than everyone haha

++my bum crack is becomming somewhat of a crevas (crevass?)... is that a bad thing? it feels kinda hot. ANYWAYS....

you know what? dad's an asswipe. seriously. he's such a fucking cunt. was MEANT to play basketball tuesday night but we got into a massive fight in the car. he then decided to pull over, hit me and scream at me for half and hour. So i missed basketball and i hate him for it. I also hate him for trying to push me inbto doing stuff that i don't want to do and for rubbing his every tiny fucking success in my face. So here's something i wrote Tuesday night when we got back from our drive [[edit: i was on a two hour train ride the second i got home cause i had to get out of here]];

9:50pm 26/4/2005

you dont have to scream
ive heard it all before
how im such a fucking failure
could've amounted to so much more

with expectations set so high
and a conscience in its place
every time you yell
i cover up
my dirty fucking face

im your daughter
im a failure
im nothing compared to you
but im your daughter
dont you love me?
isnt that what fathers supposed to do?

dont you sit there
dont you tell me
that the world is harsh and tough
you think i dont know that?
you think im happy?
well daddy
i've had enough


usually it is my understanding or belief that my true friends and family will love me no matter who i am, how i look or what i do. but for some reason i dont believe that anymore. my family [[parents and brother]] only love me when i achieve or when i put effort into my appearance or when i date someone who they approve of. the only member of my family who loves me no matter what is my grandpa and that's cause he has years and years of experience behind him and he KNOWS that the person on the inside is always going to be there. As for my friends, well, im not going to slag them off on some stupid internet website cause id much rather do it to their fucking faces, so if you get a call/visit from me and i go ape shit at you then you know why. okay?


hope you all have a drink for me tonight seeing as i have nothing to do and nobody to drink with. </3




Link7 comments|Leave a comment

Love doesn't make the word go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile [Apr. 26th, 2005|01:56 pm]
[How I Feel |curiouscurious]
[I'm Dancing To |rancid ~ out of control]

went to duaneys and saw him and jessy, hayz and mandz after a long day at work.
i was in a shit of a mood and by 3am i wasnt happy i was still awake.
kept drifting in and out of sleep which was strange cause i usually sleep heavily.
woke up on the floor at one point and kept hearing mandz calling hayz a mole.
went through all my smokes and some of hayleys as well as a homo one...yuck
watched family guy and some of minority report and comforted jessy and mandz and duaney.
hayz didn't need comforting cause she's tough. LOL.
spent Monday with Danny celebrating which was nice.
Only had one small fight about where to eat lunch which makes me laugh now that i think about it cause it was such a petty thing to fight over.
last night watched movies and bludged with him and got lots of cuddles.
this morning i slept in and spent two hours trying to get home.
sometimes connex really know how to tick me off...
never realised how much i miss my brodie when im away till i come back and hold him.
got the new sum41 cd which absolutly fucking rocks my jocks.
glad that alana got her package in the mail and that i made her smile.
looking forward to my package from ash-ah-lee the sexy riot guuurl.
this arvo i have work *shudder* don't get me STARTED about work right now.
I'm just so not impressed at all.
then after work i have to rush home and get changed and go straight to a basketball game to fill in for Laura cause she asked me to.
It's a mixed game and i've never actually played a game with guys so it's going to be kinda daunting but fun at the same time.
good opportunity to meet new people and have fun.
got nothing else to say.
should be getting a nice little pay package on thursday.
then im not working till sunday so if any of you fuckers want to hang out just lemme know.
i'm off to get ready for work.
"Always remember that others may hate you, but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them back" - Richard Nixon
That Is All
Link8 comments|Leave a comment

'all i ever wanted was you' [Apr. 12th, 2005|05:27 pm]
[How I Feel |mischievousmischievous]
[I'm Dancing To |pink ~ my vietnam]

quizes and shitCollapse )

Don't have much to say right now
diet is going okay
done lots of situps, push ups and walking...
still gotta do a bike ride tonight
having fish and rice and salad for dinner YUMMMMMM FISHYYYYYYY!
i'm happy
doctor got all my medicines sorted out so i'm all set to get better
working friday not saturday
swapped shifts with jess cause she wanted my shift
*shrugs* just means i can see Away From Now on Saturday
talked to michael today
he busted his knee real bad and might need an op =[
watching Men In Black II atm
missing a few people
sent Tawnie her bday pressie.... cost me close to thirty bucks just to send the damn thing
not to MENTION how much i spent on her.. HEHEHEHEHE
*evil grin*
whats everybody doing tomorrow?
Link4 comments|Leave a comment

[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]